"Bobby won a cap gun at the carnival. I told him I didn't want him playing with it in the house. We went home that night and had dinner. I made momma's chicken fried steak recipe. The secret is crushed up corn flakes. If you really crush 'em up small, they make the best coating. It was a big spread; potatoes, green beans, sweet tea, and a whole mess of country gravy. 

Bobby ate faster than normal and wanted to play in his room. I told him I better not hear that cap gun go off or I'd tan his hide. We was sitting around the table having a smoke and Rodney and me hear a big pop and then a loud scream, louder than any scream you've ever heard, I swear it. We ran upstairs and found Bobby lying face down on the floor, kicking his little feet he hurt so bad. I told him to look at me. He put his head up and all I could see was red. 

Rodney grabbed him and ran to the station wagon. We went right to County General where a young doctor saw him right away. Turns out, a small piece of metal was in the cap and got stuck in Bobby's eye. The doctors had to take it. He had the bluest eyes, like what the sky must look like while you're underwater. It's a real shame. 

We're back this week with a hottttt ass lineup:
Bryan Gutmann
Jaffer Khan
Dusti Rhodes
Arielle Norman
Danny Goodwin

Hosted by the Captain and Tenille of Austin Comedy, Andrew Murphy andAaron Brooks

Spider House Cafe and Ballroom - 7/11 - 9:30 pm - $5 general admission, $2 students, $0 service industry."  

-Aaron Brooks, presumably. I haven't read it yet.